wont sync my video which doesnt appear in library PLEASE HELP iPhone

ok it goes like this: i copied a movie to the library tab, in itunes. then i tried to sync with my iphone4, i went to movies tab in the iphone setion and checked the option. itunes said it wasnt able to sync cuz the movie is not supported. (it was a .mp4 file)
after i ve done a little research, i found out that i should select the video from Movies Library, then Advanced > Create ipod or Iphone version. DONE. The thing is i guess itunes crashed so i had do end the program from Task Manager...
NOW COMES THE PROBLEM:
atm i DO NOT HAVE the video in LIBRARY, Itunes wont let me add it again, BUT WHEN I CONNECT MY IPHONE TO COMPUTER, IN IPHONEs movie lirary, THE FILE STILL APPEARS. and also says itunes is not able to sync...
so i cant remove the file manually cuz i dont find the flder anywhere in my computer.
i will attach sum photos as well:)
http://postimage.org/image/1gifcsnno/
http://postimage.org/image/32z8asrno/